Dr. Phil on growing your marriage

27 04 2006

Part of Dr. Phil’s advice to married couples is to write a 65-item gripe list.  Imagine telling your wife, “I wrote a list of 65 things you do that bother me, and I’d like to discuss it.”  Uhh…  I wonder how long it would take to recover from this…

Supposedly Dr. Phil’s marriage of 30 years is great, so he probably knows some things.  Nonetheless, I figure there’s some issues to deal with before presenting a 65-item gripe list.  Or could it possibly be what is needed to get that started?  Any thoughts?




4 responses

27 04 2006
Proffessor of Common Sense:

Uhhhh… what’s he got… a death wish?

I thought the first ‘guy’ rule for marriage was NEVER tell her what you’re REALLY thinking…
She doesn’t want to know you’re thinking about sports, or cars, or wondering just how long WILL that dust particle hang in the air…

Not when she’s “communicating” with you… & don’t even get me started about what would happen if you started a ‘gripe’ list…


I can see it now…

Wife enters the room: “honey… do these jeans make my butt look fat?”
Husband slowly puts down the paper and looks closely at his wife before replying:
“baby… it’s not those jeans that make your butt look fat… it’s your butt that makes your butt look fat…”
6 weeks later husband finally regains consciousness at the local hospital…

No thank you! 🙂

27 04 2006




Are you CRAZY???! If you had several mil like Dr. Phil, then I can see maybe doing this, but…

8 07 2006
9 years in and more to go

I wouldn’t call it a gripe list, but he is quite right. After 9 years of marriage I’ve learned that if your spouse is doing something that urks you, tell her right away. If you don’t it will be like an infected wound. It will start out as a small insignificant things. Then is will swell up. Then it will get infected. Then it will spread and get bigger. Then one day when you have had one of those days and your spouse does that annoying thing, you will snap and go off like an atomic bomb. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen the damage from an atomic bomb on old war test movies, but it’s much harder to clean up the mess from an atomic bomb, then to just clean up and bandage a wound when you get one.

14 07 2006

I agree that issues need to be dealt with. Any unresolved issue has the potential of exploding or imploding, causing much damage. However, I don’t necessarily agree with the idea of putting them all into one big list and trying to conquer them all at one time. I imagine it could seem quite overwhelming to your spouse to hear 65 things that he/she does that bothers you. I think spreading them out over time is a much better approach.

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