dealing with a bad attitude

27 02 2007

You’ve probably heard the saying, “Attitude is a little thing that makes a BIG difference.”  It’s certainly true.  The past few days have been a struggle for me, much more than normal.  Last week some issues at work became a big deal, where I believe I was wrongly judged and thus wrongly treated.  This really bothered me, because it’s hurting my reputation, my career, and my opportunities for raises.

I won’t go into all the details at this time, but I wanted to bring it up to give context for what I’m saying.  The past few days I’ve dreaded going to work.  I felt unappreciated for the work I’ve done, and it feels like some of my teammates are ruining my career (and I don’t know why).  It hurt me, and I didn’t like having to keep going into that situation.  It’s difficult to stay properly motivated during this time, yet I’ve been extremely busy, having to work quite a bit of overtime.

I knew I had to change my attitude.  It would be easy to keep wallowing in self-pity, feeling like the victim — and I might even be correct in that — but I can’t blame my bad attitude on their actions.  Yeah, it might be their fault that the situation happened, but how I handle it is my responsibility.  So I’ve been praying through.  I wish I could say it all happened instantly, but it hasn’t been that easy.  I have to forgive those who have hurt me, whether they ever repent or not, and part of me wants to hold a grudge, even though I know that’s not right.

This morning I was thinking of how when I have this feeling of dread and anxiety and stress, it zaps my energy, and I’m more likely to not feel so good physically.  Compare it to a day off, when you have a big day planned; even if you get up early and get the same amount of sleep, your excitement gives you more energy, and it’s not quite so difficult to get out of bed.  In both scenarios you may get the same amount of rest, yet in one you feel good but in the other you feel run-down.  So this morning I made a greater effort to focus on God instead of focusing on my bad circumstances, and it did make a big difference.  There were still a few times during the day when I had to struggle to keep my thoughts in check, but overall it was a much better day.  Even though my work was still very busy and the situation still existed, I didn’t let my circumstances steal my victory (that is, my joy and peace).

So keep this in mind when life is hard — you can still walk in victory.  Sometimes life is really tough, and it can be extremely unfair, but we don’t have to live in stress and frustration and depression.  God offers freedom from all that, but we have to make the choice to focus on Him instead of our problems.  We have to keep our thoughts under control and choose to think on good things instead of the bad circumstances.  (See 2 Corinthians 10:5 and Philippians 4:8.)

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